You know how when you’re little you have an idea of what your life will be like when you grow up? I feel like some of it comes true, but many things are different than what you imagined them to be. Being a stay-at-home mom was one of the things that I thought I would do.
I worked full-time until the week before Samuel was born. I didn’t mind it, and it kept my mind off of the waiting. As soon as Samuel was born, having a c-section did make recovery a longer process, and I had a lot of time with just me and him. This may sound terrible, but Samuel was so colicky and cried all the time that I was a little bit relieved to go back to work just to have a break from all the crying. Don’t get me wrong I love him so much, but I just needed a break.
Now fast forward to 6 months, and I miss him every time I go to work. I enjoy being able to accomplish things without distraction or him needing me, but I never knew how much I would miss being with him all the time.
Brandon and I are in a place right now where I need to work. A few weeks back I was really feeling bad about this. I felt like I was going to miss out on so many things. But then I started to think how fortunate I am. I am able to work only part-time. I also recently got a different job where I will never have to work a weekend, and I will be home by 4:30 everyday. I know many moms who have to work full-time, and I have a lot of respect for them. Because I know it must be very hard to give up that time with their children.
I used to have a very different idea of what life should look like as a wife and a mother. I thought I would have a natural birth, breastfeed my baby, and be a stay-at-home wife/mom.
But I’m learning each day that God has different plans for everyone. He may have you work or stay at home or you may be single or never have children. God does all things to bring himself Glory, and we can’t question how he decides to have us do them. I feel like I’m learning this more and more each day as a mother and a wife.
I am so thankful for the life that God has given me. I am beyond blessed to have a loving husband who works so hard to support me and my son and lead us towards Christ. I am also so thankful that God has blessed me with a child that I can love and raise to know him.
So many of my plans have not gone as I thought they would, but I am so glad that they have gone exactly how God knew they would.